Thursday, August 29, 2013


I've genuinely been a pretty happy/upbeat person my entire life. I've learned so much about myself from some of the friendships I've had. And since I've had children, specifically since I had Harper three years ago, I've learned that some people are just miserable people that you MUST vacate from your life.

People can lift you up. And people can bring you down. It's up to you who you want to invite into your life. And some people are just not worthy of your friendship.

15 Things Happy People Don't Do.

This article really spoke to my heart. It really did.

And I hope it does for you, too.

Tuesday, June 25, 2013


Back almost (exactly) six years ago, I left a hell of a job to work for the organization I currently work for. It was, by far, one of the best decisions I ever made in my life. I left the previous job as a "mutual decision" between my boss and I. Verbally, that's how it was. But on paper, I was let go. I wasn't let go because I wasn't doing my job. It was quite the opposite, actually. I was working to death for a boss who could never and would never be happy with anything I (or anyone else) did for him or the company. Just to give you a little peak into what I was dealing with: I was reprimanded for using too many sticky notes. Over the fifteen months I worked for him, I was belittled to a point that when I left, I felt I had no confidence left.

After I left, I went on 27 interviews in three weeks. Yes, 27. It was chaotic. It was wonderful. I was working with head hunters who saw my resume and had me at an interview that afternoon, literally. The company I worked for was a household name in the industry, and my previous boss was well known. In those 27 interviews, my boss' name came up quite a bit. A few times I was told that I must be an angel for lasting fifteen months with a man who, without a doubt, treated me like shit. And he did. He really, really did. It was like a real version of The Devil Wears Prada, except I was working for a man. And yes, if you didn't already know, I worked in the fashion industry.

I went on some amazing interviews in those three weeks. I interviewed for a position at Yves Saint Laurent. I was extremely intimidated when they asked me who I was working for, but was put at ease when I saw a look of shock that I'd lasted over a year. I interviewed at quite a bit of advertising agencies, public relations firms and I actually went on a few interviews for some financial firms. I interviewed for an executive assistant position to the CEO of a major high end watch retail company (and was offered the position). But my best interview was for an executive assistant position to the lead architect who designs the Marc Jacobs stores. He told me that with my confidence, he could see me really going places. And not as an assistant, but as a owner of my own company someday. (I was also offered this position.)

When you have made a career as an executive assistant, it all comes down to not only having experience in the field you're working in, but the most important thing is getting along with your boss, and he/she getting along with you. Being an assistant to someone is a very personal professional relationship. A perfect assistant for someone may not be a perfect assistant for someone else.

I turned down a few jobs making so much more money (obscenely more) than I was offered at my current job, and I look back and have no regrets (ok, so maybeeeee a little regret with the Stephan Jaklitsch position). I separated myself from the money and the glamour, and I chose a job because I knew I'd get along with my boss. The interview I had led me to believe this because as I sat there talking about my experiences and myself, I looked down at his desk and saw neon colored post-it notes on everything. I glanced at the sticky notes and saw things checked off and crossed out. I'll always wonder if "hire the perfect assistant" was on that list.

After I was offered a few positions at the same time, I sat and I thought long and hard about where I'd be happy. I knew, I REALLY knew, I'd be happy with a boss who used a lot of post-it notes.

And six years later, I realize I was right.

Friday, June 14, 2013

Hypospadia Repair

It's no secret that the month of May was rather difficult in our home. Aside from the fact that our daughter broke her leg after falling off a ladder at the playground, our little man had to have surgery to repair a hypospadia. A hypo-what? Yeah, that's what I said when he was born back in November. In technical terms, our poor baby had his urethra in the wrong place. In more understandable terms, his pee hole was not on the tip of his penis.... it was on the shaft. So while I was lucky enough not get to get peed on like most mothers of newborn baby boys usually do, I had to deal with our boy being put under for two hours while he underwent a surgery to repair the imperfection.

When our baby was first born, our obstetrician told us that he couldn't perform a circumcision because our son had a hypospadia. I never knew this type of thing even existed. But it did. And our little man had it! So I did what any parent would do. I researched to find the best pediatric urologist in New York City. Listen, we live in the best city in the world. A city not only filled with the best shopping (ha!), but also filled with the best doctors! We found the doctor, made an appointment, the rest is history.

Little man had his surgery just a few days after his half birthday. It was a very long stressful day, but all worked out well. The worst part was when he was waking up from anesthesia. They warned me that he would probably cry for about a half hour straight, and nothing would soothe him. They were right. It was horrible. We were also told that he would be in visible pain for the first day, and then wake up better the next morning. They were right about that also. He was extremely clingy for about a week, but that was ok because I took off work to be with him. And honestly, I didn't mind the bit of clingyness.

It's now almost four months after the surgery and he's perfect. He's always been perfect. But now, as our pediatric urologist said.... "He has a perfect penis!" Awwww.

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

20 Random Facts About Me

About five years ago, there was a Facebook frenzy on this topic. Everyone was doing it. I was included in the "everyone". I compiled a list of random facts about myself and shared it with my 400+ friends on Facebook. Now, my life has changed. I reread what I wrote almost five years ago, and while some of the facts remain the same, they don't seem as important. I've kept a few of the "original" facts from Facebook, but I've added some new ones too!

And here it is..... after the JUMP.

1. I love cats and can't imagine a home without one.

2. I love, I mean, REALLY LOVE flea markets and I believe nothing is as good as vintage.

3. Since I was a young teenager, I wanted to be an attorney so I could fight for animal rights but I didn't get accepted into a law school.

4. My favorite food is french fries. I can eat french fries with every single meal.

5. I would completely skip dinner to have a huge ice cream sundae. And I have! Many times.

6. I truly believe that every person comes into your life for a reason - whether it's good or bad. Each person you meet is your mirror and they add to you in some way.

7. I used to think that the people who get to the top do so by being mean to others. I now believe it's just the opposite. I realized that the only way you get to the top is by being kind to others because getting to "the top" only means that you're happy within yourself. No one could possibly be happy by being mean all the time.

8. I believe people should talk through their issues immediately and not keep it inside.

9. I used to curse. A lot.

10. I am not afraid of bugs, but I'm extremely afraid of cockroaches. I don't know what it is but they totally creep me out!

11. Everyday, I think to myself that I'm not even responsible enough to take care of myself, let alone two children under the age of three.

12. I still don't know what I want to be when I "grow up".

13. ..... is an unlucky number!

14. Boys were really really mean to me when I was younger... they joked my hair and my freckles. I cried a lot because of this. I hated the way I looked because I was so different. Now, as an adult, I love my red hair and I can't imagine myself looking any other way.

15. I used to be on time for everything and it drove me crazy when people were late. Now, with two children, I'm happy if I get anywhere on time.

16. I hate being hot while I'm sleeping - I would rather be freezing with blankets on.

17. I remember being a child and rearranging things so that every little knick-knack had to be at a certain angle and placed just right on a shelf. I think I missed my calling in interior design.

18. I never, in a million years, thought I'd last this long in NYC.

19. Driving across the Manhattan Bridge at night, in a taxi, reminds me that we live in the best city in the world.

20. I am the absolute most indecisive person about EVERYTHING - but I was sure, without a doubt in my mind, that I wanted to be with Charlie forever.

Monday, June 10, 2013

25 Things My Children Should Know About Me

I came across this list on another blog and thought, "Hey, WHY NOT?" So I've decided I am going to do this. I think it will be a good thing for Harper and Adler to look back on. AND it will be an assignment for myself. When I was in college, I loved my writing classes because a professor would give us a topic and we'd have to just run with it. My husband and I talk about this situation a lot - how, when you are in your studies, you are forced to be creative. But then, you graduate your studies and you have to create your own assignments! So here I am. I'd love if you followed along.

Becky xxx


1. List 20 random facts about yourself.

2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.

3. Describe your relationship with your spouse.

4. List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.

5. What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?

6. If you could have three wishes, what would you wish for?

7. What is your dream job, and why?

8. What are 5 passions you have?

9. Describe your most embarrassing moment.

10. Describe 5 pet peeves you have.

11. Describe a typical day in your current life.

12. What’s the hardest part of growing up?

13. Describe 5 weaknesses and 5 strengths you have.

14. Describe when you knew your spouse was the one or how you fell in love.

15. What are your 5 greatest accomplishments?

16. What is the one thing you wish you were great at?

17. What do you think your spouse loves most about you? And what do you love most about your spouse?

18. How did you feel the moment you became a parent?

19. Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.

20. Describe your relationship with your parents.

21. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?

22. What’s your favorite holiday and why?

23. What’s your favorite and least favorite thing about parenthood?

24. What is your favorite part of your body and why?

25. List 10 things you would hope to be remembered for.

Thursday, May 23, 2013


Two weeks ago I received a text from our nanny that no mother wants to receive. I was in my office pumping when the text came in: "Harper fell at the playground. She is hurt. You need to come home."

Our nanny has been with us for over 2 1/2 years. She has seen and taken care of Harper with horrible colds, vomiting, high fevers. When Harper is sick, she has a preferred list of three people - her mommy, her daddy, her Sha-Sha.... in that order. I immediately called our nanny to learn of the damage.

These are the words I heard in 10 seconds: fell ladder cried limping not walking emergency room.

If you know our daughter, you know that she doesn't sit still. EVER. She doesn't walk. SHE RUNS.

"What do you mean, she doesn't want to walk?"

I leave my office in a panic. I don't even tell anyone I'm leaving. I hail a cab and tell the cab driver that I need to go over the Manhattan Bridge to Fort Greene, Brooklyn and politely (or not so politely) say "you better not tell me you aren't taking passengers to Brooklyn." I email my office to tell everyone that Harper is hurt and that I'm already on the way home. On my way, I call Harper's pediatrician for advice on what to do. They tell me to bring her in.

Harper is a tough girl. No, really. She would rather hang out with the 5 and 6 years old boys she sees at the playground than the little girls playing nicely. When we met in the doctor's office, she immediately told me she was hurt. I asked her to see if she could walk. She was scared, but she put weight on her right leg and crumbled to the floor in pain.

She was called back to the room at her pediatrician's office and was seen by the physician's assistant. At this point, Harper was Harper. She was joking around - laughing - smiling. Being her charming self. The PA ruled out a fracture, saying, "If it was broken, she'd be in pain. Her spirits are too high for a broken leg." We were sent home. After getting home, Harper still would not walk. She sat on the couch unable to move.

The next morning, her leg was swollen and bruised. Back to the doctor we went. The PA ruled out a fracture but said she would like to send us to the ER "just in case". The x-ray tech at the hospital also ruled out a fracture. Told me that our child was too happy to have a fractured leg. We were sent home.

It was 28 hours after the fall at the playground that I got a call from the PA. She explained that she got a call from the x-ray tech over at Long Island College Hospital and that Harper has a fractured leg and we need to go back to the ER immediately to have her leg casted.

Visions of a ruined Summer flashed before my eyes. No sprinklers? No swimming lessons? No dance classes? No pools? My heart was broken for her.

She was the life of the party in pediatric ER. The doctors and nurses loved her. They didn't want her to leave! She was such a trooper and didn't shed even one tear as they put the cast on her.

She was bummed for a couple of days, but quickly learned that she could still get around if she crawled and scooted. About 8 days after she got the cast, she learned that should get actually stand upright by holding on to furniture. It took her 10 days to learn that she could walk. Took her 16 days to learn that she could climb.

She got her cast off today. It was the longest 18 days of my life. She still isn't walking. She is taking is slow. But before we know it, I'm sure we will be yelling at her to slow down while she runs and jumps. We will be yelling at her to slow down while she uses her scooter down our street.

"She is determined!" her preschool director told us.
"Nothing is stopping her!" her preschool teacher told us.
"All her friends have stopped climbing at the playground and they sit with Harper and write with chalk!" her nanny told us.
"She is amazing!" everyone told us.

And she is! She really, REALLY is.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Life Change

It was one year ago today that I received the most shocking news of my life. After years of thinking we could never get pregnant on our own, I found out I was almost 16 weeks pregnant with our second child. Well, actually, today was the day I found out I was pregnant after a cheapo Walgreens home pregnancy test. It wasn't until the next day when I was told how far along I was in my pregnancy when I made an emergency trip to my obstetrician. You can read more about the story HERE.

I want to be perfectly clear that Adler was WANTED. He was absolutely wanted. He was just unexpected. We were already talking about when we would start fertility treatments again and he was coming about a year earlier than we had planned. A year ago today, I went to sleep thinking that there was no way I was going to be able to take care of another child in New York City. In our two bedroom apartment. On our fourth floor walk-up.

When I first found out I was pregnant, I was shocked. When I first looked at that positive line on the pee stick, I got an extremely loud ringing in my ears. That ringing had only happened one other time in my life (the moment I realized I was going to marry Charlie after only dating him for 4 months). I feel like it was yesterday that I was sitting in my bathroom on the toilet staring at the stick, thinking that I definitely didn't take the test correctly. There was really just NO way. NO WAY I was pregnant.

But I was. I definitely was.

I went through the next 24 1/2 weeks in disbelief. I was angry (and still am) that I lost my first trimester. I thought his first kicks were gas pains. I thought I was sick, and not pregnant.

We always fantasized about getting pregnant in our bed. When we were going through fertility treatments trying to get pregnant with Harper, we would joke about how we were going to know (down to the exact minute) when our child would be conceived. We were envious of couples who had no idea when they got pregnant. Now, we were one of those couples! Fascinating.

Adler is the most amazing baby. I can't say it enough. When I first found out I was pregnant, I was sick with worry about having another baby like Harper. Don't get me wrong, I LOVEEEEE my little girl. But my little girl is a handful. She was ALWAYS a handful. She was an extremely difficult newborn, infant, toddler.... and now, as bright and beautiful and wonderful as she is, she is an extremely difficult preschooler. That's her. She is going to change the world, I have no doubt in my mind. But I secretly (or not so secretly) hoped that the baby I was about to have would be easier. And he is!

Adler is a joy in my life. I just adore him. He is so easy going. And so so so happy.

I still find myself looking at him every day and just wondering how in the world he came to us. How his little soul chose us to be his parents. I may never know the answer to this, but I know that I must have done something pretty amazing in my life to deserve him.